Shit’s changing yo

So if any of you guys have been on my site within the last day, you probably noticed that shit’s been going down in terms of not just layout, but review style. Here’s the skinny: basically, I determined that there is no reason to do long reviews anymore, and instead will focus on getting in much more albums, with much shorter reviews that are less of an analysis and more of a humorous comment or meme or whatever the fuck. I came to this conclusion due to a lot of things, but I’ll break down the main components here:

  1. It’s not possible to consistently do long reviews. You guys are definitely familiar with my tendency to have long breaks with reviewing. I’ve touched on this before but I finally am just done with having it happen. I’ve tried numerous ways to combat it, but the truth is no amount of fixing the way I review ill solve the fact that constantly doing long reviews is just plain exhausting. All of the other big review sites you see have lots of writers doing the reviews, even angry metal guy which yes, isn’t one guy. It’s just not feasible for one person to do at least one long review of an album a day, especially when they aren’t making any money off of it and have to do other things as well. So I had to choose between doing spurts of reviews or maybe doing a review once every few days, or doing consistently short reviews. I chose consistently short reviews because of the second reason:
  2. Long reviews did not separate my site from all the others. I wouldn’t say there are a ton of metal review sites out there, but the ones that do exist are pretty much all focused on giving extended, and detailed analysis of the album at hand. I admire that, however if all the sites do that, most of them are going to fail simply due to not having anything distinguishable from each other. So I figured, what am I good at? How could I separate myself from everyone else? I find that what draws people to my reviews isn’t just that I’m good at analyzing, it’s that they’re entertaining as well. I use funny metaphors, I make jokes, I try not to be so formal, it’s all relatable stuff. I feel like that’s why angry metal guy actually has followers, because he injects personality into his writings. Hate all you want, it’s why Pitchfork is so popular, because their reviews got known for not being snooze fests (as well as being very controversial at times). So I knew I had to make that the focus. However I can’t just copy the big boys. I can’t just make an angry metal guy clone and expect people to visit. If I’m the same as him, they’re going to visit him because they actually know and trust him. That’s why I want to make my focus not just reviews, but more recommendations. People read reviews above all to know if an album is worth hearing. So why not just make reviews that let you know just that, albeit in an entertaining and sometimes abstract way. My goal is for this site to be a site where if a metal album was released that year, it’s almost certainly reviewed here. If I can’t beat them with quality, I might as well go quantity. But above all, the biggest reason I will stop doing long reviews is
  3. No one reads long reviews. The biggest reason why I’m changing the goal of the site is that I feel like I wasn’t getting anything back with the long reviews. Sure it was great when a band told me good job on my review. But let’s be real, a lot of that was because I gave them a good score and they weren’t well known. I couldn’t written something totally mediocre and people would’ve loved it. The bottom line is I got the same amount of praise for the short comedic reviews as I did the super longs ones, less in fact. I spent 6 hours total on the Dream Theater review this year, and it got a lot of praise. But I also wrote a joke review of Native Construct’s album off site, and it got just about the same amount of love. I feel like my effort wasn’t matching my reward.

So with these three things in mind, I’m going a new direction that will focus on letting you guys know if something is good, rather than giving analysis that you just don’t care about.I would love feedback if you guys have any. Who knows, maybe if lots and lots of people complain I’ll do something different. Probably not though, I’m a bit too jaded at this point.

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