Doomas – La Muerte ALBUM REVIEW

Question: has there ever been a band labeled “dark metal” that has ever turned out to be good? I sure haven’t. It should be a warning sign by now, but I’ve seen it just little enough to where I’m curious each time. I really shouldn’t have been, because this was exactly as I expected, which is to say, not good.

And it was apparent that it was going to be bad from the very beginning. Another one of those warning signs, opening with sad acoustic guitar. That’s probably one of the biggest signs of amateurism in metal, because it shows that you only have a surface understanding of what makes people feel. Being in a minor key isn’t automatically sad, and neither acoustic guitar. I’ll probably be screaming this for infinity, but I feel like I need to say it every single time. And the worst part is that it’s actually worse without the acoustic instruments. Because when they actually try metal, it sounds like just really shitty deathcore. Not like, brocore level, but certainly bad deathcore. It’s not really that you can’t understand a word the vocalist is saying that’s bad, that’s expected in extreme metal. What’s bad is that he sounds like the lite version of someone gurgling during a seizure. Not mention the mindless chugging that you would imagine would go on in deathcore like music. But it gets weird because, and this is the reason this score isn’t lower, there are then sudden moments where the acoustic sections sound actually kinda cool. They involve some cool rhythms, upright bass (when’s the last time you heard that in metal?), the previously awful acoustic guitar, and it sounds like something made by someone who actually understands music. It then immediately goes back to shit, but the most frustrating aspect about LaMuerte is that there is potential. It’s barely ever exemplified, but it’s there nonetheless.

Doomas very much takes influence from neoclassical darkwave, which is a bit of a red flag as that is really easy to fuck up. And oh boy do they fuck up, creatively in fact. One of the tracks opens with soft sad piano music and the sound of wind blowing, which is already pretty damn cheesy and bad, but that’s not where they fuck up. No, they added a sample of a women crying softly in the background. No I am not shitting here, they actually were so unsure that the audience would get the blatantly obvious intended emotions of the track, that they thought they should metaphorically just yell at the top of their lungs “HEY, THIS IS A SAD SONG, IT’S IN A MINOR KEY, YOU SHOULD BE FEELING DEEP DESPAIR BY NOW”. I would call it insulting the listeners musical intelligence, but I think this band has already shown such a lack of respect for that that I don’t think it needs to be said again.

The big word of the day here is uninspired, which succinctly describes this entire album in shorter terms than I ever could. Not only is nothing about this new, it is tropey as tropes can get. Which makes every time it doesn’t sound like shit, all the more infuriating. The sad part is they will probably never learn, as so many people eat this shit up because it’s just dark enough to make them feel edgy, but inoffensive and obvious enough to not make them think. Not as if metal is supposed to be a hyper thinking genre, but it should be at least somewhat up to you what emotions you feel when you hear something, not just forcibly stamped on your forehead, like here.

As an aside, I’m only putting this on the Doom list because the band self labeled themselves this way. I figured if I’m going to take a shit on them, I should shit on them at their terms.


2.5/10

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s